At the very outset here we wish to make something very clear. There are no perfect parents¡­we all make many mistakes.

However, even if you could have been an absolutely perfect parent there are some kids that will choose to try drugs or sex or whatever else they want to try regardless of the warnings and pleadings of loving and worried parents. You have not failed. The universe is set up so that every person has the power of individual choice.

It is not possible for any parent to prevent a determined child from eventually finding drugs or a gang or a sexual partner. So stop feeling guilty mom and dad. Unless you have taught your kids to break the law and to do drugs and to be sexually promiscuous, it is not your fault your child has decided to risk taking drugs or doing whatever. Kids have the power to choose for themselves no matter how much you plead, warn, preach or forbid and it is a fact they can and will choose for themselves and there is not much you can do about it.

However, when dangerous behavior is observed, parents need to act before a child reaches 18 years of age. After age 18 your child is considered by the law to be an adult and you have no rights as a parent, and your options dry up.

Sadly, there are times when a home situation can reach such disastrous proportions that a professional intervention is necessary. Such situations occur when a child (usually a teen) becomes rebellious and so physically destructive and violent that he/she becomes a danger to himself or herself and to other family members. When a child is defiant or is in trouble with the law or has started using alcohol and/or drugs, runs away, or is out of control sexually, parents must understand that special measures are immediately necessary to safeguard the life of the child.

When kids who have never been much of a problem begin to act out, some parents discount the behavior as just normal teenage rebellion. Other parents go into denial and refuse to recognize the seriousness of the behavior or where that behavior might lead. They are bewildered and allow the behavior to continue so long that some of these children reach the point of no return and are lost because they overdose or they die in drug or alcohol related accidents. Some children have become so depressed over their inability to recover that they have taken their own lives.

With such mortal dangers as drugs and AIDS in today¡¯s world parents cannot afford to wait too long to seek professional help.