GREETINGS DEAR PARENTS
I sincerely hope that this newsletter will be of value to
you, and that at this point in your life you are learning
more about parenting and loving those precious children
of yours more every day! A quote that I think is very meaningful
at this time is one that is very thought provoking and hopefully
will stir your souls, is: "No
success can compensate for failure in the home!" -
David O. McKay. Oh yes, let us feel the stirrings
of guilt, but perhaps that is good in this case. Often the
feelings of guilt are not productive, but in certain instances
these feelings may lead us into the path of a better performance
as parents.
You may have thought that I love to stick you in the heart
with a piercing sword each time I attempt to write this
crazy newsletter, well, yes, I am trying that! No, not really.
The desire of all of us here at Familyhood is the family
as a whole and thus we are as interested in your well being
as we are in the well being of the many wonderful and precious
children of the world. (In spite of the, shall we say, challenges
we have in raising the little monsters - (oops, that
just slipped out!)
DAD'S CORNER:
"THE BEST PORTION OF A GOOD MAN'S LIFE IS THE LITTLE,
NAMELESS, UNREMEMBERED ACTS OF KINDNESS AND LABOR." -
William Wordsworth
MOM'S CORNER:
We find delight in the beauty and happiness of
children that makes the heart too big for the body"
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
One last note on the ARGUING
we have been discussing the last three Newsletters:
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THE MYSTERY OF THE TEENAGER:
This Newsletter I want to discuss part of an article
found in the Orange County Register, then the next Newsletter
we will continue this, and also give more information
on these strange but very real aliens amongst us!
This article appeared Jan. 5, 2005 in the paper and
is a short article with facts and ideas from a book by
Dave Walsh - "Why Do They Act That Way? A Survival Guide
To the Adolescent Brain for You and Your Teen" Sounds
like a great book to read!
He talks about the teens and why they can't help driving
their parents nuts with their moody behavior. Scientific
research tells us that the teens do or don't do what they
are supposed to do not just because of changes in their
hormones, but, BECAUSE OF CHANGES IN THEIR BRAINS! Hallelujah!!!!
A little piece of the puzzle as to why we want to send
these little 'sweethearts' to the moon, or at least to
another state to live with one of our least favorite relatives!
"Puberty triggers a spurt of brain-cell growth, a process
of over-productive and pruning back, that by the late
teens ideally produces an adult with a well wired brain."
Mr. Walsh tells us: "If I were to compare the teenage
brain to an automobile, it's as if the gas pedal is to
the floor and there are no brakes. That combination explains
the impulsivity, the quickness to anger, the risk taking.
Kids will feel very strong emotions and impulses at the
very time their ability to think ahead and consider consequences
is under construction."
He tells us that there are different things going on in
the development of the brain at different stages of a
child's development, this one is just a bit hard to watch
and to 'wait out'. This growth spurt has a greater impact
on the wiring of the brain than at any other time during
our development. During this time we want to help them
develop the skills for impulse control, planning ahead,
making considered decisions, and the ability to reflect.
Well, that's a nice idea Mr. Walsh, .... wait, watch and
help! The next newsletter we will go into a bit more of
his ideas on how to do some of this helping. In the meantime
let us try and deal with their mood swings and rash behaviors
by not over reacting and yet not granting them the absolute
freedoms they so desire. As Dr. Jones says, "kind, but
firm."
I call the crazy teenagers sour puss apes. They walk
around like apes, mumbling, and they always have a chip
on their shoulder. Our little 4 year old grandson, even
at his young age does a great impression of the teenager
I think we'll take a picture of him and save it until
he gets to be one of the 'aliens'.
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May God bless you in this great and challenging work,
there is nothing harder, and nothing more rewarding!
Love to all - Lillie - editor
